Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
