I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Why did my mother make you get naked?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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