But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Randomize
