he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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