PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Come back. Shots need mouths.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
