don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
