I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize