we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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