from now on my penis is your penis
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Randomize
