Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Randomize