Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame