somebody snuck up and got me drunk
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that