when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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