David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
