is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
