and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
