I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
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