i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
