did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
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