drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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