I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
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you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
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I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
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