Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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