I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I use my feet as sexual weapons
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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