i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
