Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
