Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
