Where is the hickey?
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
