You're so nebulous sometimes
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
