Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize
