She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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