butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
