have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
