I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
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