the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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