I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
