I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize
