...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
