I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
