oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
He passed out mid-signature
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
