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  • Submitted by ReesesPoofs on Nov 28, 11 at 3:02pm

    ...he texted himself while crying alone in his room eating a tub of chunkey monkey ice cream and jacking off to a picture of his ex.

    • 68 87
      Submitted by nunubeest on Nov 28, 11 at 4:57pm

      masterbating using his own tears as lubricant

      • 80 86
        Submitted by Cyrus81585 on Nov 28, 11 at 8:53pm

        That was once, and it was Valentine's Day.

  • Submitted by nunubeest on Nov 28, 11 at 3:05pm

    the best sex is with a constant partner you both learn how to drive the other crazy

    • 68 84
      Submitted by threeoneseven on Nov 29, 11 at 10:44pm

      Hmmmm. You sound like one of the good guys ;-)

  • Submitted by Phys on Nov 28, 11 at 3:58pm

    At least it won't be hard for her to find someone better and smarter than you

  • Submitted by tlovell on Nov 28, 11 at 6:49pm

    Looks like his girlfriend just lost a 170 pound douchebag tumor

  • Submitted by Onplanetvenus on Nov 28, 11 at 4:47pm

    You don't text message breakup

  • Submitted by cpt_obvious on Nov 28, 11 at 9:36pm

    I see stds and multiple paternity tests in your future.

  • Submitted by AreYouShittinMe on Nov 28, 11 at 10:42pm

    How about you not being a douche about it and just breaking it off with her?

  • 96 90
    Submitted by 370HSSV on Nov 29, 11 at 9:22am

    Hope you get herpes motherfucker!

  • 89 99
    Submitted by skoot32 on Nov 28, 11 at 4:25pm

    Thats when you find a girl who likes to share... Then its never normal.

  • Submitted by bigdickplaya on Nov 28, 11 at 11:20pm

    Yeeeeaaaaaahhhhhh!!! BUDDY!!

  • 70 84
    Submitted by BBW69 on Nov 28, 11 at 3:53pm

    Hahaha @ReesesPoofs!!

  • 73 91
    Submitted by peachpie88 on Nov 29, 11 at 9:50am


  • Submitted by Quake6 on Nov 29, 11 at 2:45am

    any of you even consider that maybe she just sucks that bad in bed?

    • 33 48
      Submitted by DerKarismatisch on Aug 13, 12 at 6:16pm

      Maybe she was "bad" by this douchelord's Charlie Sheen standards...

  • Submitted by txt_frm_nxt_wk on Nov 28, 11 at 5:41pm

    F.A.B....fuck a bitch

  • 57 76
    Submitted by rhyno49 on Dec 1, 11 at 1:05pm

    no one on this forum is married I'm guessing.

  • Submitted by Bahaha1204 on Nov 28, 11 at 7:48pm

    ahahahaha awesome

  • 27 42
    Submitted by DerKarismatisch on Feb 7, 13 at 11:14pm

    For what it's worth, at least he's being honest. He could have strung her along for years before telling her this.

  • 44 84
    Submitted by thatkidx on Dec 2, 11 at 2:03pm