he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
