he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Randomize
