She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Randomize