Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
