If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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