i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
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