Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
