thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
