I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
