he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i will never coherently bang her
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
