What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Randomize
