I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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