Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
